Stuff White People Like

This blog is great. Some excerpts.

#2 - Religions that their parents don’t belong to

White people will often say they are “spiritual” but not religious. Which usually means that they will believe any religion that doesn’t involve Jesus.

Popular choices include Buddhism, Hinduism, Kabbalah and, to a lesser extent, Scientology. A few even dip into Islam, but it’s much more rare since you have to give stuff up and actually go to Mosque.

Mostly they are into religion that fits really well into their homes or wardrobe and doesn’t require them to do very much.

#28 Not having a TV

The number one reason why white people like not having a TV is so that they can tell you that they don’t have a TV.

On those lonely nights when white people wish they could be watching American Idol, Lost, or Grey’s Anatomy, they comfort themselves by thinking of how when people talk about the show tomorrow they can say “I didn’t see it, I don’t have a TV. That stuff rots your brain.”

It is effective in making other white people feel bad, and making themselves feel good about their life and life choices.

Though these people often fill their time by talking with other friends who don’t watch TV about how they don’t watch TV, looking at leaves, cooking, reading books about left wing politics, and going to concerts/protests/poetry slams.

Generally this makes them very boring and gives you very little to talk to them about. It’s important that you NEVER suggest they are making a mistake or that there is a value to owning a TV. You should just try to steer the conversation to allow them to talk about how they are better than you.